Author Topic: new to Brum - just saying hello :)  (Read 9194 times)

Virgil

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Re: new to Brum - just saying hello :)
« Reply #55 on: February 25, 2015, 11:39:01 AM »
I'm not saying this yet.
I just say that my wife had a very full life, from professional point of view, and now she is only doing some volunteer activity, something related to families in vulnerable positions. This is just not enough for her dynamic style.

She explored a bit the opportunities of a job, but probably she have to cut a lot her experience and skills to get one. Companies are not answering to a candidate who used to have 200 people under management, and apply now for an office job.

I could ask my wife to work with me in the company where I am working, but this would be something weird for both of us. We never worked together until now, so this would be not the first option.

We didn't decide yet, we are discussing this days about it. I just need some advices how to council someone who had a full professional activity, and now she cant figure any professional challenges. For a dynamic person, staying without job 3 months, is awful.
Considering I am earning the same money everywhere in the world, I am thinking to set myself where it could be easier for my wife, too.

Not yet decided, though

Phil

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Re: new to Brum - just saying hello :)
« Reply #56 on: February 25, 2015, 12:25:30 PM »
Not that I have ever been outside this country by choice, but if I ever had thought of moving to another country for work reasons (which I wouldn't) then the reasons you outline in your last couple of posts would have been the first that I investigated.

I fear this is not an uncommon problem with the new influx of peoples from the EU countries. More often than not they head for this country and even if there is the offer of employment,  they don't stop to think of the impact on the rest of their family. When they arrive here they begin to realise all is not as they first thought.

They find everything is stretched to breaking point, hospitals overcrowded to breaking point, schools falling down, overcrowded and failing their pupils, unemployment at an all time high (no matter what the government says), and the benefits system stretched to breaking point.  None of this is helped by the extra demand that is put on the system.

Perhaps another part of the EU might be more suitable for your needs?
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Virgil

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Re: new to Brum - just saying hello :)
« Reply #57 on: February 25, 2015, 12:45:12 PM »
I believe you misunderstand me or I wasn't so explicit.
It is not about difficulties to "make a living".

It is about a clash of cultures and too many new things that needs to be faced actively in order to have a better insertion.

Several years ago, we had helped a lady, wife of a British man working in Romania. She was bored and she couldn't realize a purpose for herself.
She didn't understand Romania, she had no friends, not activity. She helped me a bit with my company, she was discussing with several clients of mine and eventually she started a job in one of my customer's company.

indeed, I am linear In my profession, I have an objective and I am enough content fulfilling this objective. This covers my needs for social activity, for networking, for professional development, and also offers me the confirmation, the recognition anyone needs.
I was assuming that my wife could just take her time to insert in this new culture, slowly, as she is not rushed by anything.

She seems to refuse to take her time, she wants all "here and now" :)

What I want to ask is the advice of a local housewife. How they make it? what is motivational for them? In our experience, housewifing is hardly an option, we don't know how to relate to this.

I hope I make it clearer, now.

Phil

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Re: new to Brum - just saying hello :)
« Reply #58 on: February 25, 2015, 01:35:50 PM »
Virgil

I thought these passages very explicit,

"She explored a bit the opportunities of a job, but probably she have to cut a lot her experience and skills to get one. Companies are not answering to a candidate who used to have 200 people under management, and apply now for an office job".

"and now she cant figure any professional challenges. For a dynamic person, staying without job 3 months, is awful".

"The other one refuse to realize that other kids of 3 might not speak Romanian :) "they told me something today but they can't speak so I ignored them".




These are the passages that are relevant to my reply, as far as being a housewife I can offer no advice as I have no experience in that field and it is beyond my technical ability, though the wife keeps trying to reach me.

Make Love Not War

planetmalc

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Re: new to Brum - just saying hello :)
« Reply #59 on: February 25, 2015, 03:43:44 PM »
I could ask my wife to work with me in the company where I am working, but this would be something weird for both of us. We never worked together until now, so this would be not the first option.
 
We have an expression, "Beggars can't be choosers".    If your wife is having real problems doing unskilled work, you should get her to come and work with you if that's possible   -   who knows, you might both end up liking the arrangement. O0
 
My 40 years' experience of working in Britain is that half the people in offices are having extra-marital affairs :o , so having your wife where you can see her could be a good idea! ;D     
There's no B/S on Planet Malc.

Virgil

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Re: new to Brum - just saying hello :)
« Reply #60 on: February 25, 2015, 04:13:50 PM »
I don't know how this applying for a job works.

I never applied for a job in my life. I just took it, from companies who were already in my network and they knew me.
Actually, I was never thinking as myself as "working somewhere", but I am rather considering myself supporting a project.

in my opinion, having someone working at something less than his/her skills is a severe management mistake.
It will be sorted somehow.

The question I am asking is not how to find a job, but HOW other women staying temporary at home support this.
Nobody in our circle of friends is able to answer this, because nobody we know stay at home :)

Virgil

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Re: new to Brum - just saying hello :)
« Reply #61 on: November 24, 2015, 05:40:55 PM »
This post started 1 year ago :)

time passed so fast :)

Virgil

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Re: new to Brum - just saying hello :)
« Reply #62 on: September 04, 2017, 10:17:11 PM »
After two intense years in Birmingham, 6 months ago I took an offer in Buckinghamshire.


The cities I can compare are almost belonging to different worlds.


I will refrain from doing any vertical comparison on the axis good/bad.


Is just my amaze and the joy that the overwhelming depression and negativism I perceived about people in this country was something rather local.

polly.cam

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Re: new to Brum - just saying hello :)
« Reply #63 on: September 05, 2017, 12:34:44 PM »
Helli Virgil. Welcome to England. I have only just joined this forum, born in Brum left in 1964. Refering to rude people you will sadly  find them everwhere . Generally speaking most Birmingham people are very friendly. I am staying with my daughter in Manchester for a while and they are very friendly here too i think Northerners are. Its very brave of you and your family to be here with the lanuage barrier and different ways of doing things.